FRUSTRATION.

I am very very frustrated right now.

1. I lost my tube pass today. I hate wasting money, especially when its a gift from my parents. I dont take my parent's money for granted and I try to value every dollar that I have. Therefore, the loss of my tube pass really made me upset, simply because I cant believe how incredibly stupid of me it was to accidentally drop it.

2. School. The classes here seem so much harder than they normally are at BYU. I think a lot of that has to do with the fact that I can never find any quiet space and that I'm in one of the most exciting cities in the world. Regardless, I'm used to being at the top of my game and here I feel like I just dont have as much control over my academics as I would like. I'm not going to end up getting the GPA I had planned to get for this semester, and that stresses me out.

3. Sleep. I dont get any. End of story.

4. The girls. Everyone here is getting very nasty with each other--recently in the past few days I have received a LOT of attitude from individual girls and sassy rude comments. A lot of the girls here are extremely insecure and feel like they need to prove themselves and compete with individuals--they want to be the smartest, or the prettiest, or the funniest, etc. and it just causes a lot of unneeded tension. Also, I get comments from a lot of girls telling me what I can and can not say, and I do not appreciate self-righteous and hypocritical people trying to tell me how to live my life.

And then there are the comments about gaining weight. Every day, I hear the same girls complain about their weight over and over again. "I'm not exercising enough!" "I'm not eating healthy enough!" "I've gained weight!" "I'M FAT!" It's ridiculous and it's VERY annoying. I'm sick of hearing girls complaining about their insecurities. Oh, and then there's the comments about homesickness... Honestly, to all of you who are saying these comments--you knew you were coming to a country where there would be European food. You knew you would be taken out of your regular lifestyle and that there was a good chance you would be gaining weight. So, if you can't handle what you knew would inevitably happen, WHY DID YOU COME?? And even more so, if you're going to sit in your spot of privilege in London and just complain about wanting to be back home, why are you still here? And why did you apply in the first place? Your complaining is doing nothing but ruin other peoples experiences. Tons of people would die to be able to be given the opportunity that you have been given, and instead of making the most of this time, you are complaining. I'm sorry, but to all of you insecure, ungrateful twits--shut up.

Luckily, I have been blessed to have gotten close with a GREAT group of friends who are comfortable with themselves and who make my experience in London here better every single day. I love them and they bless my life more than they will ever realize.

To the original dorm 4 divas--I love you all.

Sorry, for the negativity, but my anxiety is mounting up and the best way for me to release it sometimes is through complaining. Tomorrow I'll be more upbeat.... pinky promise! Also, I talked to this girl today:

no one on this planet can make me laugh harder than Brittney. She is the funniest person I know and when I was talking to her today everyone kept on asking me what I was laughing at. I can seriously always count on her to make my day better.

And with that, I'd like to conclude this post on one final note:

"Gotta blast!"